EMPOWERMENT: BREAKING DOWN DEFENSIVE WALLS

Article by Cinthia Singleton
Photo Credit: Dasha & Mari
Magazine: Issue #21

One day we cruise along with a song in our hearts. The next might be rife with sadness, perceived or actual. The ‘actuals’ could be a death, departure, flood, fire, major setback or even, in some cases, changes and opportunities that come out of left field. The ‘perceiveds’ on the other hand…from these we build the walls of defense.

Anger
Grief
Confusion
Fear
Prejudice
Intolerance

Encounter. AngerGriefConfusionFearPrejudiceIntolerance. Ignition. The experiential arc has a purpose… to feel as the zombies cannot… to motivate us into action when we’re miserable or close to the bottom. Can’t deny it, it’s as organic as the fires after a years of drought. But sustaining it (and the walls that come with them) may not be practical after a time. Then we have trouble:

Growing
Loving
Letting life’s joys into our hearts too
Fully experiencing our Path and soul goals

They source from the past, from what we have KNOWN and now fear. Many people find assuaging them with the denial, suppression, drugs, sex and rock and roll helps. Or they attract like-minded who don’t challenge moving past them. Good reasons to put them on review every so often, eh? And that they’re combustible, as uncontrollable as a wildfire, if left unexamined?Whether a candle flame or veld fire depends on how close to home the situations and/or people strike our core.

Again
And again.

Walls were invented to protect us from intruders and harm - the actual AND the perceived - but they, too, are flammable. So to grow we might either need to let them burn down and rebuild better ones suitable for today and now.

See, some walls are vital and healthy; they’re called boundaries.

So each time you encounter the emotions, give ‘em a howdy. Look them in the eye. Start there. Feel them. Hope to grow beyond them. Be:

self-aware
listen to yourself, your breathing
feel your first reaction to the situation, people around you, etc.
don’t immediately re-act, just breath, observe and listen
listen
[ journal, paint, write, compose, dance, talk ] about them
learn coping techniques

And always ask yourself: What am I so [ afraid of, sickened by, defensive of, etc ] ? If this answer takes you to a place in the past, and likely it will, there’s where you find a wall that could be to be taken down. Ask for help if that’s hard. We’re all doing this, some might be a little further down the road.

“I am building a fire, and every day I train, I add more fuel. At just the right moment, I light the match.” Mia Hamm

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WHAT ARE YOU KNOWN FOR?
EVERYBODY'S GOT THEIR SOMETHING

Article by Cinthia Singleton
Photo Credit: Rose Jane
Magazine: Issue #19

We spend an awful lot of time and energy trying to find our own brilliance and the hidden talents that make us special and give us value. As Nikka Costa sings, “Everybody got their something.”

Brilliance

Genius

Talent

Some get to find their ‘something’ early in life and the quest is about perfecting it while others struggle with breaking out of prescribed comfort zones to take steps and make discoveries toward It (the WHAT that we accomplish). We become known for It and then, if we’re lucky, we receive ribbons, prizes, money and more! Really, it begins as an essence that radiates outward for which no golden guy is ever given.

Essence is energy.

Energy is transferrable.

Energy transforms.

We are energetic beings.

Let’s stop letting our linear mind complicate things. Now.

What a waste of energy it is to search and search in order to GET something or an outcome when you can take that energy and put it into creating fundamental interactions that bring more of this brilliance TO you and, therefore, the right outcomes for you?

We’re talking about finding our own brilliance by way of “like attracting like.” Search for it in others, surround yourself in that appreciation of the simplest of somethings, and yours is/are easier to find. See? It’s a magnetic field that you create just by being energetically engaged.

Here’s an exercise to include in your day-to-day activities with every person you encounter. The person you pass on the street. The clerk at the store. The mail carrier. Someone ahead of you in line.

1| Stop all thoughts and judgment. Take a breath and center in this moment.

2| Just look at the person. Observe them for a moment, quickly. What is the ONE unique thing about them that you can say is unique, interesting, special. Another way to look at this is: what is the thing about them radiates?

Kind eyes

Warm energy

The swift way they relate to a problem

Their thoroughness

Sound of their laugh

Animated hands when they speak

3| Don’t put them into a category or type. Energetic beings have no title, rank, nationality, color. When you find yourself doing so, go back to that quality in Step 2.

4| If they make eye contact with you, smile. Oh, what the heck… even if they don’t make eye contact, smile; smiles are energetic blessings.

The simplest things will speak to you.

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