HOW TO OVERCOME MOM GUILT

The brilliant Arianna Huffington described motherhood best when she said “they take the baby out and put the guilt in!” I cannot think of a better way to describe mom-guilt. It’s not anything you plan for, or even truly expect, until it’s there. Mom-guilt is like an avalanche, it’s quiet and unassuming, then all of a sudden it takes over and you’re completely blindsided and unsure of the next step to take.

This is yet another one of the uncomfortable conversations we have to have. If we don’t, we’ll continue to be brought down by all-consuming guilt. It’s nagging, relentless and unless we come together and support one another, the conversation isn’t going to change. We owe it to ourselves and future generations of strong girls, to find ways to thrive in-spite of the guilt we’re constantly confronted with.

Today I’ll get real about how mom-guilt really looks and feels, to debunk the feeling that you’re in this alone. Identify what type of guilt plagues you, and discover questions to ask yourself to change the story moving. Don’t leave before learning my simple strategies to flip the script and start feeling relief today!

Mom-Guilt is Constant

Mom-guilt is relentless, and it really covers all angles. . .

There’s the constant pressure that you’re not doing enough - should my kids be in extra-curricular activities, are they doing well enough in school or do they need a tutor, should I let them play the extra sport they’re asking to?
There’s the pressure that what you are doing isn’t right - will my daughter ever stop crying when I drop her off, did I choose the best activity for my son, are both kids being treated fairly?
And then there’s the guilt that you’re doing too much - are my kids in too many activities, are we completely oversubscribed (and if so, how do I ever change it!), will there ever be a day with no obligations ever again?

The Hard Truth

No one has the answers. And honestly no one wants to say they are struggling. It’s vulnerable and uncomfortable, and way easier to tuck it away and pretend it doesn’t exist. But that’s not how we live an exceptional life, that’s no way to be, so together we’re going to change the conversation! Here are a few questions to consider:

What is your guilt changing?
Is it making a difference in your daily life in a positive way?

If your guilt isn’t creating change you're excited to see, then it’s time for a change. I’m the first to admit, change is hard, but it’s worth it and most importantly you’re worth it!

What Can I Do?

The best way I know to make lasting change is to start small. To start with micro-goals that almost feel laughably tiny. The teenier the better, because those are the changes that are doable. Changes you can put in place today and get a fast YES I did it!

So give yourself 5 minutes today to sit in quiet and consider the smallest piece of guilt you could release. Start super small and feel how that changes you:

Do you beat yourself up less?
Do you have more energy?
Do you smile more?

Find those small feelings of guilt that you can safely leave behind, work to actively take away their power, and focus on the small positive changes.

I hope this blog has made you realize you are not alone, mom-guilt is something we all struggle with, whether it’s a conversation we are having or not. I truly believe the more we can come together and talk about the tough subjects, the better we can show up for the ones we love (ourselves being at the top of that list!).

Now it’s your turn to take these insights to the next level.