5 STEPS TO TRANSFORM YOUR TRIGGERS

In order to control our emotional triggers, it’s first important to understand what our emotional triggers are. Believe it or not, emotional triggers don’t have to impact us negatively. In fact, emotional triggers can be helpful and also expansive, if we allow them the space to do so.

An emotional trigger is anything that evokes an emotional reaction from us, such as a memory, situation, or experience.

Most (not all) experiences that have caused our personal triggers have happened sometime during our childhood. Because of these early experiences, and our inability to process the emotions effectively, we internalized them. We then found coping mechanisms to deal with the internalized, unprocessed emotions, leading us to an emotional trigger later in life.

Thankfully, there’s hope. We can take our triggers and utilize them for our personal growth and expansion. Instead of allowing our triggers to be a “negative” we can use them to explore the emotions attached to them. By doing so, it allows us to process those emotions, instead of allowing them have control over us.

A few examples of emotional triggers are listed below:

Feeling rejection
Feeling abandoned
Feeling helpless
Feeling like someone is avoiding you
Feeling judged
Feeling shame
Being blamed for something
Being ignored
Feeling discounted
Feeling controlled
Feeling taken advantage of
Feeling vulnerable
Lack of boundaries
Feeling self-conscious

How we respond to a trigger, impacts how well we manage our emotions.

Below you’ll find 5 steps to help you move through your triggers more effectively.

1. Pause and identify.

If you are to take control of your emotions, it’s vital to pause and identify what exactly is triggering you. Being able to pause and identify the feelings you are feeling is the first step in taking control of your triggers. Ask yourself the following questions: “what am I feeling right now?” and “what happened to make me feel this way?”

2. Own your emotions.

Society’s programs have led us to believe that there is something wrong with expressing our emotions. That couldn’t be further from the truth. Our emotions are our guidance system. They are constantly telling us what we want and don’t want. Instead of burying the emotions coming up, take time to identify what you are feeling. Identify them with an “I feel” statement or statements and then also note where you are feeling them in your body.

3. Identify the origin of your trigger.

Ask yourself where this trigger is coming from and if possible, link it to a specific experience in your past. This takes practice, but once you can identify the origin, you can dispel the emotional reaction to it.

4. Express your emotions.

Journaling is a great way to get the emotions from the inside out. Allowing yourself the space to express your emotions through writing, offers a beautiful new perspective into them. Another way to express your emotions is to talk about what you are feeling with someone who is open to listening, but not fixing. Being able to express yourself, without someone trying to fix you, is vital to your personal expansion.

5. Be patient.

Identifying your triggers takes time, be sure to give yourself grace when beginning to implement this practice. Give yourself time to move through them, without any expectations. When we release the outcome, it gives us the flexibility to move through them at our own pace.

As you begin to notice your emotional triggers and move through them, they will no longer feel as if they have control over you. Instead, as you take back your power, you can use them to grow and expand in a more positive way.